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An excerpt from Mortal Self Tells the Soul
A poem channeled from Seth by Jane Parker and shared in the book The Nature of Personal Reality
" But now
my body trembles and breathes deep.
Ancient angers
rumble up from my toes.
A dull heavy black hole
rises up through my belly to my throat
and empties its load upon my tongue
which turns leaden
with unsaid uncried things,
long forgotten by my mind
but clotted in my blood.
Ashen statues
of unspoken vowels and syllables,
images I should have kicked,
all from my lips go toppling "
The specifics merge,
the icy heavy mass
grows alive in birth
and rushes
squalling, out
into the universe.
Shapes and colors,
blacks and purples mix
with the skyscape’s
great moving picture
and are lost
and redeemed in it.
And I feel you now, even in my anger,
splendid and terrible
emerging through my flesh
with the rightness of storm winds
and clouds blowing,
devastating the landscape
yet filling it with freshness,
sending debris flying
full blast and releasing
new tubers
which lay hidden under
and are justly served by my anger,
which lifts them
and you and me altogether
over repression’s frosty land,
surging in giant free swirls
that burst like summer lightening, flashing
and speeding over the countryside,
joyously furious.
This poem presents a picture of renewed vigor rising from depths of confusion. Feelings are taking on a life of their own as they no longer remain embedded in the secret that bore them. Aptly expressed, the release of feelings convey a deep sense of relief from memories, nested within a relationship once solid with trust. That once stable foundation of trust makes letting go complicated. But the bastions of survival reach beyond any hesitancies to let go. The hurt is palpable, yet the absolute necessity of change resounds. I hear regret, relief, a tempering of reason and, at the end, a bit of reconciliation that is imagined as an uplifting release.
It speaks of emotions long repressed that have now, after perhaps many years of being hidden, emerge into the light. As attempts to smother them fail, the stories driven by emotions rise to the surface to be released. Freedom of release wins at last, fueled by once repressed anger. As Seth tells us, these emotions surge in giant free swirls and burst like lightening as they spread over the countryside, joyously furious.
This must be what it feels like to open up without regret about something that devastated you. It may have taken years to awaken to the yearning to be free and complete, to be whole again, to be able to reconcile and embrace the nightmare that happened to you. You now need to share what has been buried for so long. The reasons for trying to imagine that it never happened, the reasons for hiding it from those close to you, are not important. What is important is that you have freed yourself to heal.
